Work continues

​I am definitely becoming a farmer. I spend nearly as much of my time in overalls as I do in "normal" clothes. I even went down the street in them the other day, in the ute. It's official!

Slowly, things are happening. It's funny, I seem to spend 3 weeks researching, organising and trying to get things done, to no avail. I get very frustrated, mildly despondent and then in one afternoon, I will achieve more than I have in the last 3 weeks put together.

​In desperation, a few weeks back, I hired a hand pushed rotary hoe. I'm still waiting for that tractor; roll of eyes. So with the help of a friend, we hoed enough space to get the bulbs done. The rest can wait until that tractor comes, all the spring flowering seedlings are being started in protection. We have nearly 2000 bulbs in the ground now. Only a couple of hundred left to go; phew!

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​What has been really lovely, is people coming along to help. People I know well and some I have never met before. All these wonderful people are popping out of the woodwork, lending their support and getting involved. It's great! It's so nice getting to know people on a fresh country hillside, with your hands in the dirt, popping anemone after anemone into the ground. And the work is so much more enjoyable. They can be long days by yourself, on your hands and knees, going cross-eyed at little bulbs and corms!

What's more, every time ​I get despondent, I think of all these wonderful, like-minded people who have into my life since I decided to grow some flowers and put 'em on Facebook. I feel re-invigorated. Surely, I am on the right path if all this love keeps exploding around me, right?

Brightness on a grey day

My lil organic flower farm is pumping out some beauties. They make me so happy :-)​

Not keeping up appearances

We live in an age of image proliferation.  We are all concerned with appearances, whether we like it or not.  We all sensor representations of ourselves and our lives (maybe all is a stretch, I don't think my man does?!). But it is time to get real. I'm not saying you have to go and put all your "ugly" photos on Facebook (I don't, I'm extremely "un-photogenic"... roll your eyes); we just have to recognise that every image we see has been chosen for us to see.

Like this one:​

​It is not necessarily a "false representation". More likely, it is just a small facet of a bigger picture and it is the bigger picture that interests me. Now, I am, of course a classic example of the above; as most people who work in a "creative", aesthetic oriented business are. I make things pretty, I always have. It is in my nature to create hopeful, joyous and beautiful objects and images. We shan't get on the couch and look at all the deep-seated emotional reasons as to why that is. Suffice to say, simply, I do it because it makes me happy.

So, here's another pretty picture ...​

Now, I'm going to give you some of my bigger picture. My life isn't all pretty flowers, gardens and sunshine. What? Really? Gasp!

My flip-side is a stupid chronic, all-encompassing pain condition called Fibromyalgia - click for Wikipedia, if you want to know more; I just spent 10 minutes trying to find a decent, informative to link to, this will have to do! 

​I don't think it is "un-professional" for me to tell you that. I think it's honest. It's not like it stops me from doing what I do, I just "manage" how I go about things. I might work a bit less often than some but I work just as hard. Writing here that I have Fibro' won't change the world but it might mean that one or two people get a more balanced view into my life and that is a good thing.

Imagine if, for one week, every image posted, sent and printed, all over the world had a "dose of reality" caption; a little subscript telling you something real (read: less than perfect) about the subject. Wow, what we would learn! 

​I took this photo of the cosmos because the zinnias next to them are totally snail eaten.

An image tells you as much by what it excludes, as by what it includes.

​And close.

Alignment

"There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve .... the fear of failure"​

The Alchemist by Paul Cohelo

"We do not have to seek a solution to the problem of happiness or suffering, but merely realise that in reality, there never was a problem"​

Ramesh S. Balsekar

"We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us"

Joseph Campbell

Words, important words. There are ga-zillions (that's not a real number) of words spoken every day. I hear tra-billions (neither is that) of words every day (and yep, a lot of them are mine), and I read a couple o thousand more, but there are only a few that you really need to hear. So how do you find them? Well usually they find you, you just have to have your ears open.

Sometimes, I give the important words a hand at getting heard and pull some cards. I've never done tarot and I'm not so esoteric as to walk around doused in crystals talking to the spirits of the air. But I do believe that there are tools to access knowledge, knowledge which you probably already possess and that you just need to uncover. So when I am feeling a bit stuck, or like this morning, wonder what it is that I need to be aware of to allow a positive reality to come about, I pull out a deck of "Guidance Cards". Man, even the name makes me cringe a bit, but hey, it works for me. Somewhere in those brightly coloured cards will be a message that I need to hear. 

This morning it was:​

"While it is essential that you do everything in your power to fulfil your goals, it is equally important to know when to back off and allow the Universe to work it's magic."

​And a bit later on:

"Overdoing is fear in disguise."​

Hmm, interesting...​  But it is so hard to tell where that line is sometimes, isn't it? When do you stop "doing your best" and "striving for your goal" and start "forcing reality" and "overdoing it".​

Well, I've been trying to figure it out for about 25 years now...​

I'm still working on it!​

Have a peek

Oopsies, completely forgot to tell you all. The fantastic Eco Brides did a lovely little post on us, pop over here and have a gander:​

http://ecobrides.com.au/wp/organic-flowers-at-the-urban-flower-farm/​

Hypnotized

​Now, I know it's not cool but I'm typing away to Ani DiFranco.

I'm tucked up in my lil cottage in the mountains and for the first time this year, the mists have descended. When it's like this, I can't see more than 2 meters from my window, the trees are giant ghosts standing over me, guarding and the rest of the world? Well, it doesn't exist, there's just mist.

There's a beautiful stillness ...

Thank freakin' god!

This is, I trust, the calm after the storm.​ The proverbial storm, in this case, came in the form of DOUBT. Giant big, all-pervading, universe altering, terrifying doubt. The kind of doubt wherein you question not only your entire future but everything that has already been... it's NOT fun. It is, however, I can (in my big, grown-up, rational way) recognise as sometimes being necessary. Because it brings change. Unfortunately when you are in the middle of it, feeling quite alone and just a little bit nuts, that doesn't bring much comfort. But then that's the point, if you were comfortable you probably wouldn't get off ya pa-touty and hustle. 

That's evolution, for you :-)

So now I feel excited but slightly ill, because in order to celebrate my new commitment to life, I just went and spent a whole heap of $ on seeds and bulbs! Now I have to get my hands on that tractor and harrows: asap. This is me saying, Universe, I'm dedicated and I trust you (so pleeeeeeease get me that tractor by the end of the week). Thanks.

Here we are

We (read me) gone and got us a website!

Welcome, to all our new friends and readers and thanks for following, to all the ol' faithfuls. It is so lovely to have your support.

The last month has been a roller-coaster (not an analogy that I usually relate to)​, ups and downs and round-abouts all over the place. A month out from walking away from my faithful (and much loved) day job, I have moved back to the cottage in the mountains and decided to truly take the leap with this organic flower growing project. But with change, often, comes doubt. Put your life in a paper bag and shake it all about (just like shaker fries, remember those?) and you start to worry about how it is all going to land ... and if you'll be covered in msg infused orange spices! But every time I stop and ask myself what I really want to do, it is this. More importantly, when I then ask myself, what is the worst that could happen? I realise that, for the first time in my life, I don't care if I fall on my face; I am not scared to fail! Woah Man. Heavy ... and totally liberating!

When I do start to feel a little wobbly and unsure, I think of some of the people who have come into my life (in ways large and small) since I put it out there that I was going to grow organic cut flowers.  And then I think, this must be the right thing to be doing because I wouldn't have met all these wonderful, creative and supportive people, if it wasn't. 

Here's a peek at a few of them:​

​Lentil. I'm just going to stop there because otherwise I'll go on about how awesome she is for ever...

Months back Thea, of this delightful little publication - Spoonful - contacted me. The edition was to be all about flowers :-) and when Thea discovered that I was not only a florist but also a (budding) grower, she asked me to write a little something extra. I was truly honoured and my words ended up as the lead article in this small but ambitious little 'zine. I urge you to have a look over at their blog, where you can also purchase these little gems of joy. Since it's publication, I have had some heartwarming feedback.

​img courtesy of Spoonful zine

We also recently shared our produce with Honeybee and Blossom as part of the Sustainable Living Festival. Our organic flower posies adorned the H&B stand, nestled amongst honeycombs, honey ciders and just about anything else "honey" you can think of! It was a great way to get out there and to help raise awareness about the essential connection between flowers, bees and food - our food.

​imgs courtesy of Honeybee and Blossom

​There many others I could mention too, most of them have found me through my blog and social media. I never thought I'd be particularly "in to" social media but each little comment or encouraging email makes the world of difference. In a society and an industry that doesn't always celebrate or reward integrity and authenticity; you can sometimes feel a bit alone with your dream. But then someone gets ridiculously excited about the beauty of a few of your homegrown flowers and you feel like you can conquer the world.

From the garden

last week ...​

The end of 2012 looked like this:

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I'm not a big party animal generally, even less so when it comes to New Year's. I'm more of the opinion that we should welcome in the new year, in the way we would like it to continue and do something that you love. So no surprises here, I stayed home and played in the garden :-)

Notes from the festive season

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Eeek! How did we get here already? It's been 2 months since I last wrote? How ridiculous! It's not like I haven't had things to say, either. In fact, just between you and me, my dears, I quite often write to you in my head. If only all the blog posts I write in my head actually got onto the virtual page!

Oh well, not to worry, or one could turn something enjoyable into a chore and we don't want to do that now do we Lindsey? Hehe...

Enough about what hasn't happened, onto what has:

There was Christmas, obviously. For me, Christmas this year involved a carnival and an unexpected guest. My mother, in her ever enthusiastic and slightly child-like manner decided that this year we should have a Carnivale themed Christmas. Extreme use of colour, costumes and party hats were called for and Mum declared her intention to make a 50m paper chain with which to decorate the entire living / dining area! I am proud to announce that she succeeded too, with a little help from my sister. The linking span was installed Christmas night, after the lunch and the presents and the festivities, Mum wasn't going to leave that 3m un-festooned, even if it was a bit late :-) My contributions were the garishly bright table setting, complete with an outrageous, dahlia sporting, arrangement and a giant wreath of paper tassels. All in all, everything looked quite jolly (in a non-green and red kind of way).

And so, onto the unexpected guest ... a day earlier, my sister and I drove to Bendigo to celebrate Christmas with my dad's family. It was there, that for the first time ever, we met our Grandfather! What? How? You say. No need to go into details, really, it's just one of those silly family stories of estrangement that you hear of. It wasn't a big deal, we just didn't know our paternal grandfather and never expected any different. But I am really happy to say that things changed, for whatever reason, and as a result (without pre-warning!) we met Arthur. Now I know where my nose and that slightly deviant family sense of humor comes from. But what really tickled me, was that Arthur (from now on to be called Pop) is a gardener! I think he was quite taken with the homegrown flowers that I had taken up to my Aunts'. "Larkspur" he said, "I haven't seen larkspur in years." And "These poppies are just like poppies used to be." That made me happy. Here was me thinking that I had come from a family practically void of any gardening talent. In fact, until a couple of months ago, I wouldn't even have considered myself a gardener! 

Families are funny things.